kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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