Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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