thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
