of course. lets lasso hookers.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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