Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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