He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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