Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
