I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
