i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
