How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
