She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Randomize
