I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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