considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
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