do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
