Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize