walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
God, I missed his penis.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
