Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
