Dual....:-)
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize
