I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
