you have to choose: penises or morals?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize