are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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