That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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