What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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