I hate all girls vehemently.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
