we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
