I just saw a hot homeless man
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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