Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
