the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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