So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
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