Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
