Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
