went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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