I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
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