I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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