I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
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