he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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