Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
