I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Randomize
