She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
These tits shall not be calmed
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
