I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Randomize
