I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I would ride that face into the sunset
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
