I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
