your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
