Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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