Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
