I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I am mentally ready for anal.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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