clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
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