i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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