I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I have feelings that need drinking.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
