Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
